It's funny how I liked, and loved, some girls when I was a wee lad when they were just plain witches to me. The witchier they were, the more I loved them. A glutton for punishment, you say? Perhaps.
Melanie was a her name. She was cute. She was nice. She hugged me once after a kid named Augustine threw a ruler at me and nearly poked out my eye. (A quick hometown newspaper check several months ago revealed that my ol' childhood chum Augustine got another notch on his rap sheet for drug dealing, again. Seems that ruler throwing was just the beginning of his criminal career.)
But I digress...
I wasn't the only one who loved Melanie. Todd loved her, too. So, I hatched a plan to show just how far I would go to prove my (our) undying affection. I would buy her a ring. Yep, the fanciest, prettiest, most gorgeous ring a 10-year-old could buy.
I wonder how serious the jeweler took me when I walked into her store and started pouring over the diamond-, sapphire- and ruby-encrusted rings like a gem expert. Then, there it was. The ring that would be proud to be on Melanie's finger. I asked to see it. The lady behind the counter smiled and let me look it over. It was fine to me. I noted the price tag wrapped around it: $2.08. No problem. I reached into my pocket, brought out $2.08, slapped it on the counter and ran out the door.
The next day I told Todd I had the ring. I was too chicken to give it Melanie myself, so I asked Todd to give it to her for us. After lunch, Todd went behind her and tapped her on the shoulder as she walked with one of her girlfriends. She turned around. Todd kissed her, forced the ring into her hand and ran away. Success!!
The next day, I summoned the courage and told Melanie that the ring was from both Todd and me, but it was I who bought it. I asked her what she thought of the ring. "I flushed it down the toilet," she said matter-of-factly, smiled an evil smile, turned around and walked away.
That bothered me for a couple of days. How anyone could trod underfoot an act of love was beyond me. How insanely evil.
How insanely stupid.
For some reason, I thought of this episode a couple of years ago and finally realized that I actually stole the ring! That diamond ring didn't cost me a week's worth of lunch money, no. It was $208! Funny that the jewelry store owner didn't come charging after me.
Silly Melanie. She was pretty, but she wasn't too bright.